Why, Why oh Why.

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a2

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Dont know if these have been done, cant find them on here....so enjoy:D

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

Why do they use sterilised needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what colour bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialised?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologises for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That hurt, you stupid idiot?'

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

And my FAVORITE.....

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.

 
Dont know if these have been done, cant find them on here....so enjoy:DWhy do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle? glue tends to work when the water content evaporates - superglue works when the air excluded

Why do they use sterilised needles for death by lethal injection? sharpness - would be hard to hit a vein if same needle used on all the dead guys. A new strerile needle is a few pence!

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? shaves with a clam shell

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him? he's human - to duck is a natural self preservation instinct - you can't move fast enough to dodge a bullet

Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'? someone with a GSOH!

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes? evolution happens when a mutation occurs in a gene which confers some advantage - it doesn't obliterate the parents

Why is it that no matter what colour bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white? bubbles have no colour

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale? christmas day - bed shops are closed!

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialised? I don't - only an idiot with amnesia would

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance? Henry doesn't like to be beated. The next stage is to 'feed' said string to the hoover

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try? because you are stupid ;)

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures? through bug-sized gaps! Obviously

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologises for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That hurt, you stupid idiot?' common British curtesy

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over? I don't always....

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat? comfort! duh

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes? you do

And my FAVORITE.....

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.that's not quite how statisitcs work - you need a normal distribution to begin with ;)
:p

 
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