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Maybe so but it was a person that relies on dialysis machine to stay alive that told me that. He thought it was funny.

Q)  What sits at the end of the bed and takes the p1ss? A)   A dialysis machine. I'll get me coat............. :coat

The three wise men are " Looking after it for a friend  " on the grassy knoll. They're waiting for Judas to turn up from the garden of gethsemene with his untaxable gift of 13 pieces of silver.  Gold, frankincence and myrrh you can get almost anywhere. Supply and demand innit?

^^^And the unions would solve this how?^^^^ Are you or have you ever been a paid up card carrying union member?

There would be Keith Richards, Ozzie Osbourne and cockroaches left alive. Might as well put them in charge now, it couldn't get any worse than it already is.

Over the last week we've had the kids visiting us so we had a Christmas dinner with them. They've all gone back to their other families so today its just the Missus, the dog and me. We're off to the pub at 12.00 for a swift pint then home for food. The afternoon will be snuggled up on the...

I think the best thing to do is just carry on as normal. My generation was brought up with the 4 minute warning. When the sirens go off you have 4 minutes to live, no bombshelters, Nothing! If you survive there will be food only for those fit to work etc etc etc. The best place to be would...

It proves the old saying... " There's always something to look forward to. "

I have one customer who has to pay me cash before I start the job. It's the only way I'm sure to get paid. No other way works with him.

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I'm so pleased to hear that, I thought I was on my own :B

If that's your view of the general public what echelon do you belong to? 

I had no idea that all the footballers voted as well. :innocent

I think they do. From what l remember both Villa and City support Justice4the21 and are to some point involved.

He did tell a lot of stories about touring with the big stars. He told one about how the Beatles were his warm up act when he did a uk tour. A few years later when the Beatles had achieved messianic status George Harrison invited Joe and his missus to a party. George still rated Joe as a...

I think that was Larry Parnes or as Tommy Steel called him... Larry Parnes, shillings and pence. Edit to say we saw Joe Brown at the Town Hall in Brum about 6 years ago. For a guy in his 70's he had us rocking all night.

^^^ Oh dear,  perhaps Roy was thinking about how things might have been. ^^^ He might not want to hear "I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday" because it reminds him of the royalties he might not be getting. No wonder he didn't want to talk anymore.  I

A few years ago when l lived in Birmingham me and the mrs went to watch the Christmas parade in the city centre. There was always a celebrity in a sleigh pulled by real reindeer. This particular year it was Roy Wood, one of my musical heroes. It was cold and snowing and Roy had a couple of...

I know what you mean, I'm terrified of them too. I can't understand why though. I can't remember a dentist ever hurting me (intentionally).

Cheers for that Dave, the bleeding has stopped now and I've taken Paracetamol and Codeine but it hasn't kicked in yet. Like you say with a bit of luck it will just be a bit sore tomorrow.