Pre Xmas musings

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Ah, short socket screws, my mate was talking to a bloke who was telling him about those new accessories, they don't have screws, you stick them to the wall with silicon sealant, seriously, he'd fitted loads of them in his house.

he wasn't convinced when my mate showed him how the fronts flick off revealing screw holes

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If you trapped **** and mud through any shop you would get thrown out. It's not a difficult concept.

 
If you trapped **** and mud through any shop you would get thrown out. It's not a difficult concept.
Yes, but her boots were only mudstained, not covered in the stuff, it's a bit like chucking you out because you are wearing overalls and you've not polished your workboots.

 
Day 5

Nile Rogers.........I saw him in an interview last week for the first time when he had not got a guitar on his lap...looking for any excuse to pluck It! You don't get that with Sousaphone players, flautists, violinists....just HIM

people who feel the need/right to feel offended on behalf of others

family fun days.....fun for who?

Tw@s who have fixed backboxes with plasterboard nails

rawlplugs that have not been pushed through the material being fixed

tyraps with the tails not cut off

control panel with every wire the same colour AND no numbering

Cherished number plates that have been concocted with 250 white/yellow bolts

Ant and Dec.....now known as Dec

celebrity anything

cars with running lights under the sills

B & Q

overly bouncy ladders 

people who insist stuff is done by Xmas with 1 days notice!......not my problem mate, and why are you ringing me when you have never rung before

scammers trying to sell advertising in the Trumpton magazine or the Crime Prevention pamphlet due out next month

Michal,from InternetbSecurity trying to help me.....oh we have had some weird conversations which usually end with them hanging up,when I mention their mother/father and a syphillitic baboon OR I pretend to run around 'closing all the open windows"

 
Yes, but her boots were only mudstained, not covered in the stuff, it's a bit like chucking you out because you are wearing overalls and you've not polished your workboots.


please stop getting your news from facebook

 
cars with running lights under the sills
I would join you with the latest cars that , under EU law , have to have the headlights on at all times .      What is point of that on a bright sunny days ...we are grown ups ..if it goes dark  we switch them on ..if it gets light we switch them off .  

Automatic sensors that switch on the headlights if darkness falls ....Hmmmm  ... the M6  is elevated in my area  ... there are allotments by it with a shop selling fresh produce  ... as you pull out  of there ,   you  look right under the elevated M6 where its dark  and an approaching car flashes his headlights  at you  .... you go to pull forward  when you realize  he's not flashing  , its the automatic switching  taking over from the human at the wheel . 

This is similar to the quartz halogen  headlamps , bluey colour ,  which are on during daylight ...as they approach you the car bobs up & dawn slightly which makes the lights appear to suddenly flash at you  , and you may take it you can turn across it's path.  

 
I would join you with the latest cars that , under EU law , have to have the headlights on at all times .      What is point of that on a bright sunny days ...we are grown ups ..if it goes dark  we switch them on ..if it gets light we switch them off .  

Automatic sensors that switch on the headlights if darkness falls ....Hmmmm  ... the M6  is elevated in my area  ... there are allotments by it with a shop selling fresh produce  ... as you pull out  of there ,   you  look right under the elevated M6 where its dark  and an approaching car flashes his headlights  at you  .... you go to pull forward  when you realize  he's not flashing  , its the automatic switching  taking over from the human at the wheel . 

This is similar to the quartz halogen  headlamps , bluey colour ,  which are on during daylight ...as they approach you the car bobs up & dawn slightly which makes the lights appear to suddenly flash at you  , and you may take it you can turn across it's path.  
I hate those DRL's that all modern cars seem to come with, they are so bright that idiots forget to turn their proper lights on as it goes dark, the modern dash is permanently lit so they don't realise they have no rear lights on. Also the crappy designer rear lights that make it almost impossible to tell if someone has an indicator on if they have their lights on, also those stupid systems where the DRL'S are below the bumper resembling fog lights, you indicate left and the right hand DRL goes out, what's the point of that.

 
I like DRLs in principle, having driven  Volvos for many years, but I do agree that they seem to have become too intense and potentially obscure trafficators on some cars.

Ironically I presently have two cars which don't have them.

 
the lights are not so you can see, they are so you can be seen. doesnt help that they put them so close to indictors etc though that you then cant see them, so manufacturers are now makign them turn off when indicators are flashing. and as already mentioned, the dash is always lit so people dont notice they havent turned on their lights when its dark so the back is dark...

 
Don’t most new vehicles have automatic lights, in that they come on when entering a dark area such as a tunnel or dusk? 

Interestingly on the point of the light itself I was speaking with my optician the other day and he has told me that it had taken an age for them to get the authorities to realise that the type of light is different to the light the spectacle lenses were designed for. They are now developing an anti glare suitable for the new light emitted from new lights. So all those with spectacles watch this space as new lenses are on the way is not already here! 

 
People who think, but don't, e.g, you've just spent ages chasing out those really hard bricks to fit sockets in the kitchen, then, " I was thinking, wouldn't it be better if they all went to the right by 300mm", or you've put the boards back and re-laid the carpets, " I was just thinking, can we have a data point by the tv".

drivers who see you waiting to pull out of a busy junction, then at the last second indicate they are turning in, if they'd indicated earlier you could have got out.

Total twonks in my local Wetherspoons who walk straight in and think they're at the front of the queue.

My neighbour, won't put their car up the drive, insist on parking it on our front, in such a way that he takes up two parking spaces.

People who sell you something insisting it's the best one for the job, then when it doesn't work and you go back, they reply, "well, personally I never use them, they're not that good"

The wife when she tidies up and puts stuff away safe, then forgets where she's put it! last week I spent ages looking for my IR thermometer, gave up and bought another because I needed it, it later turned up inside a battery charger! "oh yes, I put it there so it wouldn't get lost" says she, why? it was fine where it was.

people who think their time is more valuable than anyone else's and therefore have the right to jump in front of you at any queue.

People who are not in a rush and block the aisles in supermarkets with their trollies while they tell theirfriend the latest important news!

young people who can't do anything without being on a phone or texting, My mate sent me a picture recently of a girl in the town centre, it was late at night and she'd been in the pubs, she had her arse against a shop window, her jeans round her ankles and she was peeing!, all the while she's doing this she's texting on her phone!

 
Today's musings

overly priced confectionary in motorway service stations

fat chicks in leggings that are so tight they become see through....resembles a pair of tights full of rice pudding

john sessions

john sessions again

Shop staff dressing as Xmas characters......makes me turn around and go elsewhere

TV gambling adverts

HiSpec smoke detectors.....fit AICO end of

Karen Brady off the Apprentice

Damp dry roasted peanuts

fictitious deadlines/completion dates

films/tv clips where they insist on trying to create a 'false age' by superimposing hairs and cracks onto the film stock

buying something, when I already have one, because I cannot find it.....and then it appears

constant bombardment of adverts for children's toys for Xmas....no wonder people get into debt

people stocking up with food for the Xmas break......f. F. S. Shops are only shut for 24 hours. The Spar near me opens on Xmas day morning from 0800-1200 

Oh and that little fat mockney dwarf off Wheeler Dealers

 
leggings are probably the most unflattering thing ever invented, espeically for those whose thighs rub together.... :vomit
Oh I don't know, there was a rather sexy looking young lady in the pub the other night, tall, slim with a pair of those wetlook leggings and a pair of long black boots, made me wish I was 30 years younger. lol 

 
Oh I don't know, there was a rather sexy looking young lady in the pub the other night, tall, slim with a pair of those wetlook leggings and a pair of long black boots, made me wish I was 30 years younger. lol 
Teamed With a nice woolie pullie and curly/tousled hair it gets my vote

just feeling tearful

 
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