Daft sayings

[phil d]

I was out on Monday at the pub, the grandkids are off school and it was my stepsons day off work, we haven't seen that much of each other lately so I asked him to pop round to my local for a catch up.The kids were playing on the play area and we got talking about old sayings and how you suddenly end up saying things to your kids that your parents said to you, even though at the time you swore you'd never be like your mam and dad.

Anyway we were on about stupid sayings and it got me to thinking about how mad some of them were.

"if you fall off that wall and break your legs, don;t come running to me"

"do you want a good hiding?", one wonders how many kids actually did, can you imagine it? "well actually mum, I was going to ask for an ice cream, but hey now you mention it I think the hiding sounds a great idea"

" bring that back now", usually screamed at a child after a parent has thrown a shoe at it and missed"

" what you need is a good belt my lad", the brave or foolish child replied "well actually my jeans are a bit loose"

"wait till your father gets home, that's all, just wait", wait for what, one wondered, was he bringing home a gift? bit of a long wait if your old man worked on the rigs or something.

A mate of mine had a gran who was full of really weird sayings, such as, " you can't eat a biscuit if you haven't got one" or "don't take 3 sandwiches if you can only eat 2".

Sheer madness all of it, who else remembers daft things their parents used to say, and did you ever find yourself repeating them to your kids?

 

[M107]

"Stop crying or I shall give you something to cry about"

"one day the wind will change & you'll be stuck with a face like that" said to kids when they are pulling faces.

 

[kerching]

I suppose you think this business can run without you?...as from tomorrow we are going to,give it a try 

look out of that window once more and I will close it

even when I am wrong I am right

if brains were dynamite you wouldn't have enough to lift yer cap

if I were you I'd wish I wasn't 

 

[Evans Electric]

My Mom had loads of them but sadly I'm forgetting them now .

Teck yer mac, its gooing black over Bill's Mothers .

Get yerself off to school and mind the horse road.

Whats up with yer ? Yowv gorra face as long as Livery Street.

My Dad had a lot from the Navy , which I am also forgetting .

Lot's wife   =  salt

Vanishing target   = Bread & butter.

All shipshape & Bristol fashion  =  tidy.

Three sheets to the wind   =  drunk.

 

[rapparee]

The big wheel turns slow. That's my motto for everything in work.

 

[Tony S]

The big wheel turns slow. That's my motto for everything in work.

Knowing my luck the wheel will have come off the wagon.

See my post about Kennings garages.

 

[steptoe]

now you're sucking diesel

if ye went any slower you'd be on the way back

so laid back he's horizontal

he wont break much delph

not the height of 2 turf

 

[phil d]

My mum used to say, it's not often you're right, but you're wrong this time.

Bent as a nine bob note, this referred to bent as in dodgy, not the other meaning.

about as much use as a chocolate tea pot.

as much use as an ashtray on a motorbike.

as mad as a box of frogs!    this is one of my favourites

she's all fur coat and no knickers, when referring to someone who pretended they were better off than they were.

she's no better than she ought to be.

laugh, I thought I'd never start.

 

[M107]

Champagne ideas on fish and chip money.

 

[Blue Duck]

Champagne ideas on fish and chip money.

Is that Theresa May' s next budget slogan? 

now you're sucking diesel

if ye went any slower you'd be on the way back

so laid back he's horizontal

he wont break much delph

not the height of 2 turf

Young  Irish girl I worked with kept saying this. none of the other Irish guys I was working with at the time had ever heard the saying, We all thought she was a bit mad.

:Blushing

 

[rapparee]

Is that Theresa May' s next budget slogan? 

Young  Irish girl I worked with kept saying this. none of the other Irish guys I was working with at the time had ever heard the saying, We all thought she was a bit mad.

:Blushing

She was obviously a culshie

 

[steptoe]

She was obviously a culshie

MAAAAAA,!!!!!!!!

Themuns is calling me,!!!!!!

:slap

 

[poni]

better a culshie than a jackeen

 

[rapparee]

I'm a culshie, and proud 

 

[Tony S]

OK, I’m now officially confused, what or who is a culshie?

 

[phil d]

OK, I’m now officially confused, what or who is a culshie?

It's a slang term, also spelt as CULCHIE, meaning an uncouth person or country bumpkin.

and before you ask, a jackeen is a person from Dublin

 

[Tony S]

OK

 

[steptoe]

I'm a culshie too,

City in general is McCooey,

@Tony S

Have a Google of PROC , Peoples Republic of Cork

Its got to be one of the maddest websites in existence, 

:shakehead

 

[Tony S]

Peoples Republic of Cork

I've put it my favourites