Don't you just hate it when.........?

[Mr Sworld]

D.Y.J.H.I: When your girlfriend has two of her friends over for a meal and they spend all night in the back room talking about babies........

'There maybe trouble ahead.............!'

 

[SPECIAL LOCATION]

or when u hit the chisel with the hammer and u miss ohh.

ugh!! indeed S999...

that is a real B*****d!

Right on that bit of your thumb or finger where the nails starts!!

and the black blister takes months to grow through!!

ohhhhhh aweeeee DOH!!! :_| :_| :_|

 

[kme]

DYJHI

When they KNOW you`ve got to work up the loft, but there`re piles of stuff in the way of the hatch....... X(

Then you get up there to find :

1... There`s no light.

2... There WAS vermin, now theres just droppings and poison pellets everywhere. :_|

3... There are SPIDERS (god I hate them buggrz)

4... There is also a lifetime`s accumulation of "junk" stacked up everywhere, and its dinnertime before you`ve cleared the area you need to work in; but can`t stop for food cos you`re running late, and anyway you`ve got rat poison and mouse p o o all over your hands (plumber also working in house - no water). :_| :_| :_|

Which USUALLY means no flippin` cuppa either

Wish I could wake up for me cheerios after that, but it weren`t a dream!!!!!!

 

[SPECIAL LOCATION]

DYJHIWhen they KNOW you`ve got to work up the loft, but there`re piles of stuff in the way of the hatch....... X(

Then you get up there to find :

1... There`s no light.

2... There WAS vermin, now theres just droppings and poison pellets everywhere. :_|

3... There are SPIDERS (god I hate them buggrz)

4... There is also a lifetime`s accumulation of "junk" stacked up everywhere, and its dinnertime before you`ve cleared the area you need to work in; but can`t stop for food cos you`re running late, and anyway you`ve got rat poison and mouse p o o all over your hands (plumber also working in house - no water). :_|

Which USUALLY means no flippin` cuppa either

Wish I could wake up for me cheerios after that, but it weren`t a dream!!!!!!

Ditto bloomin ditto!!!!

bin there dun that..

got the T shirt!! :_|

(i had forgot that one... but it all came flooding back!!!!)

Doh Doh Doh!!!

:^O :^O

 

[kme]

DYJHIWhen they KNOW you`ve got to work up the loft, but there`re piles of stuff in the way of the hatch.......

Then you get up there to find :

1... There`s no light.

2... There WAS vermin, now theres just droppings and poison pellets everywhere.

3... There are SPIDERS (god I hate them buggrz)

4... There is also a lifetime`s accumulation of "junk" stacked up everywhere, and its dinnertime before you`ve cleared the area you need to work in; but can`t stop for food cos you`re running late, and anyway you`ve got rat poison and mouse p o o all over your hands (plumber also working in house - no water).

Which USUALLY means no flippin` cuppa either

missed a bit.......

5... In 5 minutes flat you`re itching like hell from the fibreglass insulation.

6... You`re also sweating buckets, and you know its going to run into your eyes, but you daren`t wipe them cos there`s rat poison, mouse poo and fibreglass on your hands, arms, clothes :_| (and, from experience............. rubbing your eyes when you have fibreglass particles on your hands is a REALLY REALLY BAAAD idea). :_|

Never mind though - beats being bored. :^O :^O

p.s. You can also "spring" the plasterboards from their nails, just with your weight on the joists! Customer then goes off on one `cos they can see the nail heads / cracks in the ceiling....and its ALL YOUR FAULT!!!!! :_|

 

[norv]

When they KNOW you`ve got to work up the loft, but there`re piles of stuff in the way of the hatch.......

Then you get up there to find :

1... There`s no light.

2... There WAS vermin, now theres just droppings and poison pellets everywhere.

3... There are SPIDERS (god I hate them buggrz)

4... There is also a lifetime`s accumulation of "junk" stacked up everywhere, and its dinnertime before you`ve cleared the area you need to work in; but can`t stop for food cos you`re running late, and anyway you`ve got rat poison and mouse p o o all over your hands (plumber also working in house - no water).

Which USUALLY means no flippin` cuppa either

missed a bit.......

5... In 5 minutes flat you`re itching like hell from the fibreglass insulation.

6... You`re also sweating buckets, and you know its going to run into your eyes, but you daren`t wipe them cos there`s rat poison, mouse poo and fibreglass on your hands, arms, clothes (and, from experience............. rubbing your eyes when you have fibreglass particles on your hands is a REALLY REALLY BAAAD idea).

Never mind though - beats being bored.

p.s. You can also "spring" the plasterboards from their nails, just with your weight on the joists! Customer then goes off on one `cos they can see the nail heads / cracks in the ceiling....and its ALL YOUR FAULT!!!!!

:^O Thats a classic :^O :^O:^O:^O

 

[kme]

When you`ve spent all your time as a "junior member", wishing you were a "senior member"?

You find out that the "upgrade" comes at 100 posts.

Then you get to 99, and suddenly you`re an "electrician" again????????

Surely this should now be "Electrician (Senior)"? ?:|

Mind you, maybe that`ll make me sound too old?

........Cheers Wizzer..........

:^O :^O:^O:^O:^O

 

[welshwizard]

When you`ve spent all your time as a "junior member", wishing you were a "senior member"?

You find out that the "upgrade" comes at 100 posts.

Then you get to 99, and suddenly you`re an "electrician" again????????

Surely this should now be "Electrician (Senior)"? ?:|

Mind you, maybe that`ll make me sound too old?

........Cheers Wizzer..........

:^O

I did them days ago, Mate. I was wondering when someone would eventually notice.

Well done KME, take any prize off of the middle shelf.

 

[biker mike]

Well done KME' date=' take any prize off of the middle shelf.

[/quote']

Middle shelf .... u tight ^$%

 

[kme]

Wiz - Yeah, I noticed it days ago, but hand`t got round to saying "thanks mate".

Post above is my warped, twisted sense of humour way of saying cheers!

p.s. seriously - you put carpet on ceiling too don`t you????

I`m sure someone`s winding me up over this...............

Middle shelf huh?...........What`s on there then??

 

[welshwizard]

Well, seems that you noticed it days ago, I have changed my mind and you can have any prize from the Top Shelf.

Behave yourself Mikey.

:^O

 

[steptoe]

I really really cant get my head round all this label stuff.!!! FFS Im confused,

NOW Im not a senior member anymore! Im an ELECTRICIAN,

and the guy sorts it all out is just a member???!!!

I think I need more beer...

 

[kme]

Nah m8. The guy who sorts it out is a "senior member". You`re lucky, you are. You got to be a "senior member", before some blinkin` wizard came along, and turned you into a sparx. Now me, I`ll never know that special feeling that came from being known as a "senior member"!

Think yourself lucky my friend. He could have turned you into a frog!!

 

[biker mike]

He could have turned you into a frog!!

And do you really wanna be FRENCH ????????????

i think not ] ] ] ]

 

[kme]

To get back on topic:

DYJHI when:

you get a domestic occupied rewire; customer has a "collecting things" fetish, they don`t drink coffee, so the first day all you have is DECAFFEINATED tea!!!!!.

Every room has loads of stuff piled up all over the oche. Half the time is spent moving furniture around (love the old MFI wardrobes that threaten to collapse if you breathe on them.

Walls are mostly black mortar construction, apart from two stud walls, which are lath & plaster (with the obligatory horse hair!)

The walls are damp, due to porous exterior render (at least it keeps the dust down - not so you`d notice, but nevermind)

carpets are felt, vacuum`s next to useless, and then you find that the bathroom is a flat roof extension; and the kitchen below (also an extension) is constructed at a different height from the rest of the house; and you can`t find a way through with your cables.

I love my job, me.

p.s. my previous notation on lofts also holds true here.

 

[daryl631]

To get back on topicYJHI when:

you get a domestic occupied rewire; customer has a "collecting things" fetish, they don`t drink coffee, so the first day all you have is DECAFFEINATED tea!!!!!.

Every room has loads of stuff piled up all over the oche. Half the time is spent moving furniture around (love the old MFI wardrobes that threaten to collapse if you breathe on them.

Walls are mostly black mortar construction, apart from two stud walls, which are lath & plaster (with the obligatory horse hair!)

The walls are damp, due to porous exterior render (at least it keeps the dust down - not so you`d notice, but nevermind)

carpets are felt, vacuum`s next to useless, and then you find that the bathroom is a flat roof extension; and the kitchen below (also an extension) is constructed at a different height from the rest of the house; and you can`t find a way through with your cables.

I love my job, me.

p.s. my previous notation on lofts also holds true here.

Done that today on my own house extension running new kitchen ring got the sds drill out and had to remove top 3 stairs looks like the house that jack built,just comleting extension wiring and was going to take feed off downstairs light and owner said you cant take up any floorboards lamininated floor in bedroom grrrrr

 

[kme]

Done that today on my own house extension running new kitchen ring got the sds drill out and had to remove top 3 stairs looks like the house that jack built,just comleting extension wiring and was going to take feed off downstairs light and owner said you cant take up any floorboards lamininated floor in bedroom grrrrr

I have a collection of other trades, who I`ve had working in/on my house, and are recommended by me to customers (and vice versa). My tame carpenter gets the call on these jobs, comes in, lifts the laminate; and re-lays it after I`m done. Customer foots the extra cost.

 

[kme]

DYJHI:

When you`ve planned out the whole week, and:

1. you get a call from customer, delaying one job.

2. You`ve got outside lighting lined up for 2 days, and the forecast is rain all week.

3. You were supposed to finish a job last week; but the $%^&* wholesaler managed to screw up your order, and the RCBOs for the board aren`t in yet!!!!

Grrrrrrr X( X(

 

[kme]

DYJHI:

The little job to do is simkply to wire up a cooker hood.

The customers have never heard of Jif, Flash, Hot Water!!!!

EVERYTHING you touch or lean on if thick with grease - and you KNOW that it`s going to be on the handles of the screwdrivers you use, until it decides to jump onto the new carpet at Mrs Huntingdon-Smythe`s house; where you`re going later. :_|

You can feel the risk of an accident increase when you slither into the van, because your hands slide slraight over the steering wheel with all the grip of a baby-oil covered newd wrestler! :x

BUT:

I must admit I love Fridays when I`ve been able to bank lots of lovely 3 and 4 figure cheques. :x B)

 

[Nicky Tesla]

Chip board floors are easy, Just cut out a BIG square with a circular saw. It needs to be big cos a narrow piece will lose its strength, Then add some 2 x 1 to the joist edges and that simple. A big square gap is easier to fish through than a narrow floorboard size gap.