New Flask

[thebantam]

Paddy was showing off his new flask at work.

Mick said 'what does it do Paddy?'

'Well...apparently it keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold!'

'What have you got in there today then Paddy?'

'Two cups of coffee and a choc ice!'

 

[revjames]

I knew someone who was fascinated by my thermos. I explained how it could keep hot things hot and cold things cold. then came the inevitable question "how does it know to keep it hot or cold?" I told him that some are automatic and some have a little switch underneath.... kept him quiet for a bit.

 

[a1]

:slap

 

[m4tty]

:slap :slap

 

[sprocketflup]

The first time I met my mates missus we had arranged to go to a nightclub in Nottingham and me being tee-total offered to drive. Went to the house to pick them up and she had a natty little tartan dress on, looked quite the part she did, but I just couldnt help myself.

So the first thing I ever said to her was " So what have you come as then? A flask?" :slap

She admitted to me years later that she never could face wearing it again lol

 

[revjames]

I went to a fancy dress party and was surprised to see a man with nothing on at all and a girl on his back. I asked him what he had come as and he said 'a snail'... puzzled, I asked about the girl on his back. "Thats Michelle"... :coat

 

[Revved Up Sparky]

I went to a fancy dress party and was surprised to see a man with nothing on at all and a girl on his back. I asked him what he had come as and he said 'a snail'... puzzled, I asked about the girl on his back. "Thats Michelle"... :coat

What about that bloke who painted his face red and walked into a fancy dress party with his mouth full of custard ?.... when someone asked him what he had come as he spat the custard out and shouted " a zit"....

 

[thebantam]

On the subject of flasks and in all seriousness....

I've got one of those stainless one's from morrisons. One day on site this plumber (who had one as well) proceeded to tell me that if you use bleach to clean it out, it will damage it. "It will reverse the polarity" he said in an experienced sort of way!

I was just wondering if anyone can back his theory?

I've not tried as I don't want to have to go out and buy another one!

 

[revjames]

Yes it will reverse the poloarity and make hot drinks cold and cold drinks hot

 

[steptoe]

:slap

have you ever tried dismantling a disposable camera with a flash?

 

[askelectrical]

A blonde walks into a library and says, "Can I have a burger and fries?".

The librarian says, "I'm sorry, this is a library." ... So the blonde whispers, "Can I have a burger and fries?"

... sorry

 

[kme]

:slap have you ever tried dismantling a disposable camera with a flash?

Go on..........................

 

[steptoe]

ask Apache about that one.....

 

[Apache]

Go on..........................

I was young. There's a capacitor in their. **** me it bites. Hurt more than a 230V shock I got off a damaged extension lead. It was a joke.