One of many things I have failed to master.

[Evans Electric]

Curtains .

Yes curtains.... apparently I have no idea how to open or close them in a manner acceptable to Mrs Deke.

My efforts are accompanied by a fussilade of tutting and head shaking , I am obviously a fool.

There are Rules and Regs attached to curtains , theres gathers to be considered and bunching to be avoided for a start .

Now to me , curtains are what you draw to stop people looking in when it gets dark , so you drag them across until they block out the window and thats it.

No. You have to spend hours after drawing them, making all the gathers equal, why are there great bunches at each end,? why are they dead flat? What must they look like from outside?

Am I alone with this affliction ??

And don't start me on getting the duvet into it's cover. :innocent

 

[NozSpark]

I have trouble keeping the wife happy,,,, never mind blinking curtains

 

[Zeespark]

Deke, your missus isn't related to Hiacynth Bucket is she?

:innocent :coat

AndyGuinness

 

[Evans Electric]

How did you know? :C

 

[ProDave]

It's not CLOSING the curtains that's the problem, but OPENING them.

Yes, you probably think you pull them open until they are as far open as they will go, to expose as much of the window as possible to let as much daylight in as possible.

WRONG

They need to be gathered and tied in the tie back. The tie back must be arranged to hang nicely.

then they need to be closed a little to give the sides a nice slanted look. Of course they have to be absolutely equal, and you have to fiddle around to make the gathers all equal, neat and tidy.

The fact that now blocks part of the window again is completely irrelevant.

 

[Sharpend]

by the sounds of it she is related to mine:C

 

[Theorysparky]

I have trouble keeping the wife happy,,,, never mind blinking curtains

Noz

I have trouble keeping your wife happy !!!!

give it up mate...its a lost cause :innocent :run

 

[ProDave]

And what about hoovering?

On the rare occasions I do it, I walk up the room in a nice straight line, turn round, move over 1 hoovers width and walk back along the room. No two parts are covered more than once.

You should see my wife trying to mow the grass. Backwards and forwards, over the same bit of ground over and over again before moving on just a little.

 

[Theorysparky]

i dont have that problem with curtains

we have blinds......now thats a whole new ball game

are they at the right angle ???? are they both the same way up ??

why have you closed them or why only one ???? cant see the fffing football on the tv

 

[Sharpend]

Maybe she is just used too bald:run

 

[ProDave]

Then there's the toilet seat.

If I want it up, I have to lift it. Do I ever complain?

If you want it down.......

No I'm not going to win that one.

 

[sprocketflup]

 

[sparky b]

And shower mats, apparently they're not designed for wet feet...... Wet Fish

 

[Theorysparky]

And what about hoovering?On the rare occasions I do it, I walk up the room in a nice straight line, turn round, move over 1 hoovers width and walk back along the room. No two parts are covered more than once.

You should see my wife trying to mow the grass. Backwards and forwards, over the same bit of ground over and over again before moving on just a little.

Dave

Thats OCD mate.......

 

[ProDave]

Dave Thats OCD mate.......

No, it's doing the job efficiently, in the quickest time, with the least use of electricity, with the least wear and tear on the equipment....

You're right it's OCD. Guinness

 

[sprocketflup]

this whole curtian thing is pretty mad tbh.....

wait till the wifes gone abed and paint the window glass matt black..........just to see what happens

 

[Barx]

I too got fed up with the curtain malarky and fitted blinds. Now the curtains have their swagger and stay in one place. Less rules with blinds.

All in the same direction.

Direction dependant on season. Summer, they have to be so they block the most light in the morning.

Outside / Inside

Winter it's the other way round so people on street below can't see in.

Outside \ Inside

 

[Evans Electric]

Great !!!! Theres other stuff too .

Getting the leaves up in autumn , lot of trees here so theres lots, I love them.

So I get up 100,000,000 leaves , Hyacinth comes out , what about those two over there. !!!!

And the other one , put clothes on to go out , every time " Your going like that are you ?" "

 

[Barx]

Great !!!! Theres other stuff too .Getting the leaves up in autumn , lot of trees here so theres lots, I love them.

So I get up 100,000,000 leaves , Hyacinth comes out , what about those two over there. !!!!

And the other one , put clothes on to go out , every time " Your going like that are you ?" "

Yeah.... still not got round to finishing picking leaves up. Lol. Pee's you off. No sooner you pick them all up. There are more on the floor.

 

[kme]

I didn`t know the missus had so many sisters - or that they were sooooooo alike. Gawd help you all!