Things I Don't Like

[kerching]

Informative threads that fall off the RADAR

Sooooooooo!........here goes

Effected/affected accents by "media Z list celebrity twonks". Eg

Dom Littlewood the bat eared interfering slap head dwarf from progs such as "help me my house is falling down because i am gullible"

Tim Whatapratt from Bargain Unt....the bespectacled gap toothed deformed-hat doffing prannock

Barbar Windsor.........'nuff said

brucie.....obviously

Celebrity in general

Poorly spelled signwriting on vans

Jus......it is not a Jus it is gravy or sauce

Condescending Plod

Holier than thou Traffic Wardens who talk down to you and want you to feel grateful for them NOT giving you a ticket. My tickets just get added on to my customers charges anyway

Torches that are as bright as a pissh hole,in the snow

Screwdrivers with blade tips made from cream cheese

Pensioners in baseball caps

The new "rage" for BIG baseball caps with even BIGGER peaks that make the wearer look like they have fallen off Snoopy"s kennel

Cold callers who are "not selling anything but..........""

People who,phone you and pretend to give a sh'ite how you are. If I told them how I was they would hang up

Carp coffee

Punctures

Pot pourri

Fricking candles

Daytime TV

Screenwash bottle running dry on Motorway

Dancing bake off Chefs on ice in th jungle out of here

Probably a few more as I am just getting into my swing

 

[NozSpark]

Don't get me going on punctures.... I had one this morning so I ended up 20mins late before I even started!!!!

Then I left a PIR switch on the roof of the van... Only realised when I got to the job and then couldn't find it when I backtracked to the wholesalers... On the way back to the job I spotted it on the side of the road in a million pieces

The day did get better however,,,the afternoons job after adding a fair few bits to the list,, I still managed to finish on time

 

[Evans Electric]

Christmas .  Bah   humbug !            Magic time for little children .....PITA for the rest .    

Christmas adverts on TV  that start in September  .

Chistmas adverts that say I should be getting new suite from DFS  ready for Christmas.

People who decide they need to wear a red pointed pixie hat with a pompom on top .

And even worse .............Scots people reeling onto the TV on New Year,s Eve  with kilts and skirling bagpipes. 

 

[M107]

Plonker non trade persons who buy consumer units from diy sheds & install them ......................... incorrectly................. then boo when you charge them £150 to rectify the faults late at night.

X twactor (no explanation needed)

Any of the soaps

customers that leave a voicemail asking for a call back but tell you not to call when said soaps are on............................news flash eastenders ISNT ******* REAL!

People that don't put lids on bottles (my other half)

Leaving the cap off the tooth paste (why it's only a push over lid & it's done so simple but for some reason people don't do it..............infuriates me that one)

samsung S5 screen going blank meaning I have to take the battery out to clear the fault.

knobbers who ring up with the finest Asian accent giving it "heelo sirs my name is James would you be liking to buy" on the crackliest line from mumbai ......................seriously?

3 times photo copied set of plans where the print is sooooooooooooooooo blurred I cant make out room numbers for the quote!

 

[steptoe]

when you message someone on ebay for a model number and they send you the serial number,

WTF  :shakehead   do some people go to school to LEARN TO BE THAT THICK??????

 

[M107]

:slap

working at a school last Friday & a teacher was bawling out one of the kids, a line to remember I feel

"Are you thick I swear stupidity must be genetically enhanced in your blood line" msl1:

 

[steptoe]

they surely cannot be born that thick?

can they?

anyway, i gave up with my ebayer in the end,

bid on something else,,,,,,  :shakehead

what winds me up,

people that dont understand turning off lights

people that dont listen the first time

people that leave the fridge open

people that move my stuff

people that stand in doorways

people that ignore me as if I dont exist

anyway, thats enough about Aggie,

most other people I can tolerate after her,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, :|

 

[Badger]

shall i tell you all what i dislike no i HATE that fooking driver that killed our young cat!

 

[NozSpark]

I'm sorry for your loss Badger (We've always had cats up until recently), but I really doubt that he wanted to hit your cat

 

[kerching]

People who block aisles

People who carry out conversations in narrow spaces....usually shops

barclays Bank

B and Q....did ........

Curries that boast a "4 chili rating" but could safely be given to a toddler as they are as strong as marmalade

Poncey bottled water

Pretentious food

Having to explain to somebody 100000000000 times that doubling the wattage of an LED does NOT mean it is twice as bright

Customer "bought" light fittings

B and Q light fittings.....did I ever tell,you about their absolutely fuc....................

Loose Women....the Programme and NOT the lifestyle

Shoelaces breaking

Traffic cones and NO road works

BMXers who are far too big to be riding their kids sized bike with their knees under their chins

Shoppers,who steer their trolleys with their forearms

Probably a few more

 

[Blue Duck]

2d fittings where the internal components disintergrate

 

[kerching]

The tenants who have just vacated one of my Flats......it now needs new carpets and part redecorating

Chewed up threads as the "maintenance man has had a go at fixing it"

Next door tw@s caravan blocking out the daylight

Next door,in general

Her nextdoors voice.....Foghorn Leghorn with a fat arse and sparrow legs in shorts

Bus drivers

FUN days

 

[Sidewinder]

Sitting at a customers waiting for UPS to deliver parts @16:20pm that were sent on an express am delivery from Italy yesterday.

If they get here before the end of the delivery day they need them fitting tonight, else back tomorrow.

At 8 o bloody clock this morning it was loaded onto a van for delivery 10 piggin miles from the customer!

Carrier has been in once today.

Just flippin fed up.

Got over an hours drive home yet.

 

[Badger]

I also dislike cancer as my sisters just had possible secondary

 

[sprocketflup]

Car drivers who on seeing a motorcycle come up behind them, dive into the verge/gutter expecting me to overtake them.

Seriously, you don't need to do that, I will decide when/if I pass you and it certainly wont be on a blind bend with firkin great lorries hurtling the other way, no matter how far over you cringe.

Also, itchy scalps under crash helmets when you have another 80 miles to go

 

[Apache]

Also, itchy scalps under crash helmets when you have another 80 miles to go

Monkey fleas. You need a course of painful injections into the scrotum. It doesn't kill the fleas, but it certainly will take your mind off them..........

 

[sprocketflup]

Monkey fleas. You need a course of painful injections into the scrotum.

Well......if you're sure.....

are they administered by some petite blond bit of skirt with legs past her armpits? Or a clumsy burly ex truck driver trainee vet called Derek with hands the size of Pat Jennings?

**edit** you may have to google Pat Jennings you whippersnapper

And as I discovered to my chagrin today, another thing I don't like is screws in back tyres

 

[steptoe]

Pat Jennings.,!!!

Wow, that takes me back a bit,,,,,

 

[ProDave]

Car drivers who on seeing a motorcycle come up behind them, dive into the verge/gutter expecting me to overtake them.

Seriously, you don't need to do that, I will decide when/if I pass you and it certainly wont be on a blind bend with firkin great lorries hurtling the other way, no matter how far over you cringe.

Also, itchy scalps under crash helmets when you have another 80 miles to go

I was towing my caravan once, and some bikers were overtaking.  One miss judged it and ran out of room, so he pulled in the gap between my car and the caravan.  No I wouldn't believe it was possible either had I not witnessed it.

 

[Blue Duck]

People who can't park... Just witnessed someone taking 20mins to reverse into a space next to me.

I can smell the clutch :lol: It seems to these days no one can drive.