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Larnacaman's Joke selection..........
- Thread starter Larnacaman
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Help Support Talk Electrician Forum:
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All i get is black screen mate what is it ?
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All i get is black screen mate what is it ?
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Couldnt have said it better myself 
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Couldnt have said it better myself
Larnacaman
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You should be getting a Black screen with Arabic writing and a large 1 minute countdown timer.....coupled with some Arabic background music.....
Now, ...that'll scare the sh.yt outta me if i was sitting next to that person....
What i can't understand is why your not seeing it ....I am everytime i click on the link!!!! ....So here it i again see if this one works??
http://www.myit-media.de/the_end.html
Now, ...that'll scare the sh.yt outta me if i was sitting next to that person....
What i can't understand is why your not seeing it ....I am everytime i click on the link!!!! ....So here it i again see if this one works??
http://www.myit-media.de/the_end.html
Larnacaman
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You should be getting a Black screen with Arabic writing and a large 1 minute countdown timer.....coupled with some Arabic background music.....
Now, ...that'll scare the sh.yt outta me if i was sitting next to that person....
What i can't understand is why your not seeing it ....I am everytime i click on the link!!!! ....So here it i again see if this one works??
http://www.myit-media.de/the_end.html
Now, ...that'll scare the sh.yt outta me if i was sitting next to that person....
What i can't understand is why your not seeing it ....I am everytime i click on the link!!!! ....So here it i again see if this one works??
http://www.myit-media.de/the_end.html
Kwl! Works for me!
Kwl! Works for me!
Flying tomorrow actually, doubt I'll have in flight internet access on FlyBe!
Even if I did, no chance of me trying that unless I wanted to get arrested!
Even if I did, no chance of me trying that unless I wanted to get arrested!
Flying tomorrow actually, doubt I'll have in flight internet access on FlyBe!
Even if I did, no chance of me trying that unless I wanted to get arrested!
Even if I did, no chance of me trying that unless I wanted to get arrested!
Larnacaman
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Never lie to your mother...PRICELESS!!!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Peter invited his mother for dinner, during the course of the meal;
his mother couldn't help but notice how lovely Peter's flat mate,
Joanne, was.
She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and
this only made her more curious.
Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she
started to wonder if there was more between Peter and his flat mate
than met the eye.
Reading his mum's thoughts, Peter volunteered, 'I know what you must
be thinking, but I assure you, Joanne & I are just flat mates'.
About a week later, Joanne came to Peter saying, 'Ever since your
mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the frying pan, you
don't suppose she took it do you?
'Well I doubt it, but I'll e-mail her just to be sure' said Peter.
So he sat down and wrote
DEAR MOTHER,
I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU ''DID'' TAKE THE FRYING PAN FROM MY HOUSE. I'M
NOT SAYING THAT YOU ''DID NOT'' TAKE THE FRYING PAN BUT THE FACT REMAINS
THAT IT HAS BEEN MISSING EVER SINCE YOU WERE HERE FOR DINNER.
LOVE PETER
Several days later, Peter received an email from his mother which read
DEAR SON,
I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU ''DO'' SLEEP WITH JOANNE, AND I'M NOT SAYING
THAT YOU ''DO NOT'' SLEEP WITH JOANNE, BUT THE FACT REMAINS THAT IF SHE WAS SLEEPING IN HER OWN BED, SHE WOULD HAVE FOUND THE F***KING FRYING PAN BY NOW, ......RIGHT???
LOVE MUM
Lesson of the day,
NEVER LIE TO YOUR MOTHER!!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Peter invited his mother for dinner, during the course of the meal;
his mother couldn't help but notice how lovely Peter's flat mate,
Joanne, was.
She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and
this only made her more curious.
Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she
started to wonder if there was more between Peter and his flat mate
than met the eye.
Reading his mum's thoughts, Peter volunteered, 'I know what you must
be thinking, but I assure you, Joanne & I are just flat mates'.
About a week later, Joanne came to Peter saying, 'Ever since your
mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the frying pan, you
don't suppose she took it do you?
'Well I doubt it, but I'll e-mail her just to be sure' said Peter.
So he sat down and wrote
DEAR MOTHER,
I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU ''DID'' TAKE THE FRYING PAN FROM MY HOUSE. I'M
NOT SAYING THAT YOU ''DID NOT'' TAKE THE FRYING PAN BUT THE FACT REMAINS
THAT IT HAS BEEN MISSING EVER SINCE YOU WERE HERE FOR DINNER.
LOVE PETER
Several days later, Peter received an email from his mother which read
DEAR SON,
I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU ''DO'' SLEEP WITH JOANNE, AND I'M NOT SAYING
THAT YOU ''DO NOT'' SLEEP WITH JOANNE, BUT THE FACT REMAINS THAT IF SHE WAS SLEEPING IN HER OWN BED, SHE WOULD HAVE FOUND THE F***KING FRYING PAN BY NOW, ......RIGHT???
LOVE MUM
Lesson of the day,
NEVER LIE TO YOUR MOTHER!!
Larnacaman
Senior Member.
- Joined
- Oct 20, 2010
- Messages
- 734
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- 0
Never lie to your mother...PRICELESS!!!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Peter invited his mother for dinner, during the course of the meal;
his mother couldn't help but notice how lovely Peter's flat mate,
Joanne, was.
She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and
this only made her more curious.
Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she
started to wonder if there was more between Peter and his flat mate
than met the eye.
Reading his mum's thoughts, Peter volunteered, 'I know what you must
be thinking, but I assure you, Joanne & I are just flat mates'.
About a week later, Joanne came to Peter saying, 'Ever since your
mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the frying pan, you
don't suppose she took it do you?
'Well I doubt it, but I'll e-mail her just to be sure' said Peter.
So he sat down and wrote
DEAR MOTHER,
I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU ''DID'' TAKE THE FRYING PAN FROM MY HOUSE. I'M
NOT SAYING THAT YOU ''DID NOT'' TAKE THE FRYING PAN BUT THE FACT REMAINS
THAT IT HAS BEEN MISSING EVER SINCE YOU WERE HERE FOR DINNER.
LOVE PETER
Several days later, Peter received an email from his mother which read
DEAR SON,
I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU ''DO'' SLEEP WITH JOANNE, AND I'M NOT SAYING
THAT YOU ''DO NOT'' SLEEP WITH JOANNE, BUT THE FACT REMAINS THAT IF SHE WAS SLEEPING IN HER OWN BED, SHE WOULD HAVE FOUND THE F***KING FRYING PAN BY NOW, ......RIGHT???
LOVE MUM
Lesson of the day,
NEVER LIE TO YOUR MOTHER!!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Peter invited his mother for dinner, during the course of the meal;
his mother couldn't help but notice how lovely Peter's flat mate,
Joanne, was.
She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and
this only made her more curious.
Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she
started to wonder if there was more between Peter and his flat mate
than met the eye.
Reading his mum's thoughts, Peter volunteered, 'I know what you must
be thinking, but I assure you, Joanne & I are just flat mates'.
About a week later, Joanne came to Peter saying, 'Ever since your
mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the frying pan, you
don't suppose she took it do you?
'Well I doubt it, but I'll e-mail her just to be sure' said Peter.
So he sat down and wrote
DEAR MOTHER,
I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU ''DID'' TAKE THE FRYING PAN FROM MY HOUSE. I'M
NOT SAYING THAT YOU ''DID NOT'' TAKE THE FRYING PAN BUT THE FACT REMAINS
THAT IT HAS BEEN MISSING EVER SINCE YOU WERE HERE FOR DINNER.
LOVE PETER
Several days later, Peter received an email from his mother which read
DEAR SON,
I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU ''DO'' SLEEP WITH JOANNE, AND I'M NOT SAYING
THAT YOU ''DO NOT'' SLEEP WITH JOANNE, BUT THE FACT REMAINS THAT IF SHE WAS SLEEPING IN HER OWN BED, SHE WOULD HAVE FOUND THE F***KING FRYING PAN BY NOW, ......RIGHT???
LOVE MUM
Lesson of the day,
NEVER LIE TO YOUR MOTHER!!
Larnacaman
Senior Member.
- Joined
- Oct 20, 2010
- Messages
- 734
- Reaction score
- 0
.
HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? (written by kids)
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it, that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
-- Alan, age 10
No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're gonna be stuck with......
-- Kristen, age 10
WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
-- Camille, age 10
HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
-- Derrick, age 8
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MUM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
Both don't want any more kids..
-- Lori, age 8
WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough...
-- Lynnette, age 8
On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
-- Martin, age 10
WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?
I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.
-- Craig, age 9
WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
When they're rich.
-- Pam, age 7
The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.
-- Curt, age 7
The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them... It's the right thing to do.
-- Howard, age 8
IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
-- Anita, age 9
HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
I think there would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
-- Kelvin, age 8
And the #1 Favorite is ...
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like the back of a truck.
-- Ricky, age 10
HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? (written by kids)
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it, that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
-- Alan, age 10
No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're gonna be stuck with......
-- Kristen, age 10
WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
-- Camille, age 10
HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
-- Derrick, age 8
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MUM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
Both don't want any more kids..
-- Lori, age 8
WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough...
-- Lynnette, age 8
On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
-- Martin, age 10
WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?
I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.
-- Craig, age 9
WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
When they're rich.
-- Pam, age 7
The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.
-- Curt, age 7
The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them... It's the right thing to do.
-- Howard, age 8
IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
-- Anita, age 9
HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
I think there would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
-- Kelvin, age 8
And the #1 Favorite is ...
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like the back of a truck.
-- Ricky, age 10
Larnacaman
Senior Member.
- Joined
- Oct 20, 2010
- Messages
- 734
- Reaction score
- 0
.
HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? (written by kids)
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it, that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
-- Alan, age 10
No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're gonna be stuck with......
-- Kristen, age 10
WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
-- Camille, age 10
HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
-- Derrick, age 8
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MUM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
Both don't want any more kids..
-- Lori, age 8
WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough...
-- Lynnette, age 8
On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
-- Martin, age 10
WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?
I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.
-- Craig, age 9
WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
When they're rich.
-- Pam, age 7
The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.
-- Curt, age 7
The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them... It's the right thing to do.
-- Howard, age 8
IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
-- Anita, age 9
HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
I think there would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
-- Kelvin, age 8
And the #1 Favorite is ...
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like the back of a truck.
-- Ricky, age 10
HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? (written by kids)
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it, that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
-- Alan, age 10
No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're gonna be stuck with......
-- Kristen, age 10
WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
-- Camille, age 10
HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
-- Derrick, age 8
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MUM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
Both don't want any more kids..
-- Lori, age 8
WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough...
-- Lynnette, age 8
On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
-- Martin, age 10
WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?
I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.
-- Craig, age 9
WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
When they're rich.
-- Pam, age 7
The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.
-- Curt, age 7
The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them... It's the right thing to do.
-- Howard, age 8
IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
-- Anita, age 9
HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
I think there would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
-- Kelvin, age 8
And the #1 Favorite is ...
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like the back of a truck.
-- Ricky, age 10
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Nice one mate. Kids come out with the funniest things
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Nice one mate. Kids come out with the funniest things
matt.leung
Well-known member
awesome...
matt.leung
Well-known member
awesome...
Larnacaman
Senior Member.
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Our English Language!!
Oh what a tangled language English is
And how easy it is to misconstrue
Our English Language!!
Oh what a tangled language English is
And how easy it is to misconstrue
